If there’s one problem I hear come up again and again in my small neurodivergent community, it’s one thing: I need rest, but I have no time for it.
There’s plenty of reasons behind this—which we’ll get into soon—but the most obvious reason neurodivergent people aren’t getting the rest they need is because the world expects us to be neurotypical.
The world is, and always has been, built for neurotypical people. It is not built for us.
That doesn’t mean we need to rebuild the entire world, though!
In fact, today, we’re going to deep dive into all the ways you can start finding rest in your days without having to revamp your entire life.
Let’s get into it 🙂
Summary
Today, we’re going deep into how you can find more rest in your day-to-day life without having to change too much.
As much as I’d like to dive right in, we have a couple of things to go over:
- Why aren’t you getting enough rest in the first place?
- So who’s to blame: you or the world?
- Potential rest solutions you can start today
- How to make room for rest (with no time)
Of course, we’ll close out with a conclusion to wrap things up, but if you have any questions along the way, please email me directly at atlaskatari@gmail.com!
Why aren’t you getting enough rest in the first place?
The most obvious reason
As mentioned in the intro, the most obvious reason the majority of us aren’t getting enough rest today is society.
Society, as it stands, is not created for neurodivergent people. The world is too loud, too bright, too social, and most importantly, too fast.
Now, keep in mind, I stand from an American’s perspective. I realize just how fucked up that perspective of the world is, but it’s important we keep in mind that America literally creates the culture the world revolves around.
Don’t believe me?
Who are the majority of mainstream (English) artists today? Americans.
Who is on the majority of the international news outlets? Americans.
Who dictates major movie and television media? Americans.
Who has the loudest voice on the internet? Americans.
The list of all the things Americans not-so-positively impact goes on and on.
And that is why we’re all affected by American society.
It sucks, it’s a shame, and it’s hard on us all.
The least obvious reasons
Now, the lesser obvious reasons we aren’t getting enough rest is how we structure our days.
Despite the fact that you have work to go to and kids to parent and a partner to love and a pet to take care of, you do still have time left in your day. (If you truly didn’t, you wouldn’t be reading this, now would you?)
So while society at large is to blame for our overall lack of rest, you have some part to play, too.
So who’s to blame: you or the world?
This is going to hurt to hear, but… no one’s at blame.
If we spent all day blaming society for our problems, we’d never get anything done.
We wouldn’t improve our lives, try for bigger things, or even bother to dream at all.
We’d damn it all the hell, because what can we do about society? Not shit if you ask me.
This is why personal power is so important.
So while I will never sit around and blame you for something that is obviously systemic, I will encourage you to try to take back your rest where you can.
That’s the whole point of today’s post.
Potential rest solutions you can start today
- take a nap
- go on a walk
- engage in your hobby
- wake up 30 minutes early
- stay up 30 minutes late
- give the kids room time before bed
- add a special step in your shower just for resting
- spend a little extra time in the bathroom every break
- tell yourself “rest is productive” to battle guilt/shame
- redefine rest: “sleep procrastination” is actually you resting
- shower more often (make every other day a “resting” shower)
- double check your work laws (take those paid 10-min breaks!)
- make daily routine lists to automate your mornings/evenings/meals
- create a daily mantra to remind yourself of your goal to create space
- optimize what you can: meal prep, snack prep, rotating work outfits, etc.
- look up hobby content (to train your algorithm away from drama content)
P.S. Use AI to expand on my list of solutions to find more!
P.P.S. I’m AI neutral. It’s a buzzword used for fear-mongering and it’s also a real threat—just like money, power, and status. But we’re not getting rid of those anytime soon, are we?
How to make room for rest (with no time)
Okay! Now that we’ve gone through the fact that you’re not to blame for your lack of rest, and that the world at large isn’t going to change anytime soon, let’s get into how you can make room for rest in your own life starting today.
1. Recognize the problem
First things first: We’ve gotta recognize when we’ve got a problem.
The fact that you’re here tells me you’ve already realized that, but if you’re just reading this thinking it has nothing to do with you, here are some signs that you need some rest:
- you’re craving sweet things
- you sleep in a half-fetal position
- your eye muscles twitch
- you’re constantly exhausted (not just tired)
- easy tasks take longer to do
- you’re clumsier than usual
- your neurodivergent symptoms get worse
2. Audit your day
Now that you’ve realized you’ve got a problem, it’s time to take pen to paper and become analytical about what’s actually going on.
Keeping the systemic reason you’re exhausted aside, let’s take a day (or two) to truly audit what you’re doing each and every half-hour.
That’s right: I want you to take a pen and notebook with you everywhere you go for an entire day.
And every half-hour, I want you to write down what you’re doing.
This works amazing for people who are self-employed or unemployed, but even if you have a job, you still have time in your day that you’re not at that job. Those times are most important to write down.
Don’t worry, this is the worst of the steps. If you do this, you’re already halfway there!
3. Identify opportunity times
Okay! With your audit list strong and your mind rested from that huge task (take a day or two in between these steps), it’s now time to sit down with your audit list and decide what can go or at least be moved around.
For example, if you spend 2 hours at the gym 4 times per week but don’t use all of that time optimally, what if you just went to the gym for 1 hour and spent that extra hour 4 times per week reading?
Or, for another example, if you spend your hour-long lunch scrolling social media, what are some ways you could rest during that time instead? (Maybe meal prepping to save money and time, therefore you have 30 minutes to rest in your car?)
Step number four will help you identify what to do next.
4. Plug in 1-3 solutions
It’s not easy to identify where you may be wasting time, but it is easy to decide what you’d rather be doing instead—resting, of course!
Take a look at the list I provided above and consider where you can add solutions into your life.
Remember: If you feel like you have no time now, it’s going to require you to delete some things from your day-to-day to get that rest time in.
No, we are not going to be sleeping less just to rest more while awake.
Sleep comes first. So prioritize your rest time while you’re already awake.
The next step is arguably the most important step, so don’t stop here!
5. Revisit in one month
The last thing I want you to do today is set a calendar reminder for one month from now.
If one month from now, you’ve completely forgotten your goal to add more rest into your daily life, then read this blog post again and start from ground zero.
But, if one month from now, you’ve managed to add a little bit more rest into your life, then congratulations! This blog post was actually impactful on you, and you can keep going.
No matter what outcome you get, though, the last step is all you need to remember.
6. Retry, retry, retry!
That’s right!
No matter how you end up in a month from now—or even two weeks from now—the most important part of this entire process is that you retry should you fail.
The first attempt is likely not going to be the one you get right.
It’ll take two, three, four, or more tries to really nail down not only when you can rest in your crazy schedule, but how you’d like to rest, too.
This whole life thing is completely in your control.
So you’ve gotta give yourself the time to figure it out!
Final thoughts
Making time for rest is never easy. It never has been, it never will be.
We will always have demands of us external and internal.
It’s up to you to align the two.
And hey, remember that rest is rebellion.
You are not worth less just because you need more rest.